Our phone number remains the same ().

Yes, we moved into our new house on 12^th May and we're extremely happy with our purchase. I think I mentioned in my last newsletter about the circular patio and dishwasher. Other excellent features include the outside plug sockets for the lawn mower and the chimney which allows the girls to enjoy birds' berries, and hailstones from the comfort of the lounge! We are still enjoying the daily visits from the local wildlife :- magpies (sometimes five at once - I once saw four ['for a boy'] in the garden and nearly rang Carl at work, but one reared its ugly head and ruined everything), rooks (I assume), Jays (why the capital 'J'?), woodpeckers, squirrels and so on. The crow-like birds go around in a crowd and I often feel like that glamorous black and white woman in The Birds as I scuttle in from the washing line with a line of them watching me from the roof next door...

Yes - next door. Neighbours are scarce. There is a vacant plot of land on one side of us and our other neighbours live in Singapore. We have met them on a brief visit home in June/July when they apologised profusely for the (non-existent) noise they'd made whilst home. Not wanting to be out-done I too apologised for our noise but they said how lovely it is to hear children playing in the garden when they wake up!! I see his parents regularly as they tend the garden, and they hold long (and lordy lordy do I mean long!) conversations their mouths ALWAYS below the level of the fence. I miss most of what they say and nod and laugh a lot. He (possibly Phil) has told me their names twice but short of telling him to stand on a stool so that I can see his lips move when he talks, I'm not sure I'll ever catch them.

To the back of us is Green belt land hence the wild life. Green belt around here is reviewed every 10 years so that we have at least another 8 years before it can be built on. This is lovely but it does mean that the rooms are often rather dark at the back at night. Living in these sorts of conditions can tell you a lot about oneself! (Do you sense a tale coming up?)

Charlotte had got up to blow her nose (!) one night and as I took her back to bed I realised that I couldn't see a thing in her room. 'Follow me, Charlotte,' I said and I went fumbling into her room groping for her bed. Needless to say I found the bed and kissed Charlotte goodnight. As I got back into bed I said to Carl, "Couldn't find Charlotte's bed it's so dark" to which Carl replied, "You'd be no good in the forces!" Thank goodness I've never embarked on an army career! A lucky escape!

Actually I'm a bit worried about Carl's attitude to life in general. He uses phrases like 'returning to base' when he means 'I'm going inside' (from the garden) and he says 'at ease' to the girls when he gets home from work. And he's always said, if ever I want something, a slice of toast perhaps, at a time when one doesn't usually have a slice of toast, "kitchen's closed." The night before we moved, just before bed, standing amidst boxes and bags and cases, Carl asked me if I'd taken an inventory. How I laughed! I have visions of Carl metamorphosing into a Richard Briers type character in future years.

A little less Richard Briers, was the London to Southend bike ride Carl undertook in July with a group from work. They rode a total of 56 miles and I was convinced that I would never see Carl again, not least because his only training had consisted of a 6-mile cycle to Hullbridge and back. He rang me from the train (up to London) to tell me that he'd had trouble with his bike before he'd got to the end of our road! This did nothing to inspire me with confidence and so we prayed for Carl at Church that morning. Anyway, the ride was a success and Carl thoroughly enjoyed the experience.

The girls started at Ashingdon County Primary School after the half term holiday in May and I am SO pleased with their new school. Holt Farm is an excellent school but I can't believe how much more content the girls are at Ashingdon. There is very different approach to learning at Ashingdon. Charlotte went on at least one (long!) walk every week last term and had themed afternoons when they dressed as pirates and 'walked the plank' etc. Charlottes' teacher gives the children sweets as rewards and the results are FANTASTIC. She is, of course, a witch. Something of which Charlotte had informed me in her first week. I said that I didn't think she really is, but apparently, someone in Rebecca's class has seen her on her broomstick....

For their Science topic the children were asked to take in wet weather gear. They were looking at water and of course, would have to go out in the rain, splash in puddles, stand under drips etc. Mrs Furniss wrote that if it didn't rain they would have to make do with the next best thing - the hose!! What an excellent woman. She added that they were taking hair dryers in to school to dry the childrens' hair so we weren't to worry! Charlotte has never had such a fantastic time!

The whole school had a wheels afternoon on the last week of term when the pupils were allowed to take in some wheels (bike, skateboard, roller-blades etc) to play with!! It's funny to hear the parents moaning about the number of bikes they have to bring to school IN THE CAR!! They don't even consider walking/riding to school that day! We travel in the car on the Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays when I worked, but walked (it's over a mile) when I didn't. And the girls always preferred walking.

Rebecca took her SATS this year whilst at Holt Farm. We're told (by Bec's new teacher) that she did very well and we have had the results but they're not the simplest things to interpret!! On Rebecca's school report from Holt Farm it said, "Rebecca knows how to create a simple circuit and knows what will happen if the circuit is broken." WHY! Oh WHY! One of her Future Targets is "to use a Thesaurus to increase her vocabulary." SHE IS SIX YEARS OLD!

Still she's at a school now where children are actively encouraged to eat sweets and walk the plank. Hurrah!

Charlotte, for all our ridiculing, is doing well at school. I asked the witch at parents' evening whether Carl and I should refrain from calling her 'Clueless Charlie' but she said we could call her what we liked! The girls' differing intellectual levels were illustrated in two separate conversations I heard them having with Carl last week. Rebecca on the one hand (picking up on current issues but still asking a seven year old's question) asked Carl whether he would rather eat British beef or French apples (Carl will not eat French apples). Later, I overheard Charlotte asking Carl why it is that men do smelly botty burps but ladies don't!! Hurrah again!

Me

I (once again) have a new job (Tanya -did you know?!) beginning in September. My contract at SEEVIC ended on 13^th July and although they offered to renew my contract, (Jill said that if I wrote down the hours and the days I would like to work she would accommodate me!) it wasn't really economically viable. My new job is at the pre-school at the Church in Hockley. I attended an interview during which I was shown a plan of the shed - it was at this point that I began to think the interview was not going to be as intellectually taxing as I had at first feared. There were two other candidates but of course these were normal people and totally unsuitable!! I'm really pleased how things have turned out. I'll still be able to take the girls to school (it's only two mornings initially) and collect them, and of course, it's only term time. Moreover, because the job is permanent I even get holiday pay for four weeks of the year, as well as being paid an hourly rate for attending committee meetings and so on. I'll be rolling in it!

I've done the first Pre-school Learning Alliance course, but I can go on to do more and apply for a position as a Supervisor, or a teacher's assistant in a school (perhaps when Laura is older?).

Sue will of course look after Laura. Laura and Daniel (four months Laura's senior) are the best of buddies - most of the time! Once Sue 'returned to base'(!) having fed the guinea pigs, to hear shrieks from Nicola and Laura only to find Daniel holding them hostage in the hall with a sweeper. They are also the cheekiest of our bunch. I suppose they have access to so much more (potentially) naughty stuff. Sue has found them quietly covering each other in felt tip pen inside a tent before now. She recently discovered them poking stones up her overflow pipe outside, something, which Laura almost certainly taught Daniel! I'm not swift to condemn Laura though, as I happen to know that Laura was shown this by none other than my father!

I CAUGHT MY FATHER SHOWING LAURA HOW TO POKE STONES UP MY OVERFLOW PIPE. A man that knows Shakespeare, who never fails to complete the Times and Observer crosswords, a man that uses words like 'tilth', who won't eat foreign food or watch ITV. He has a novel approach to children. I recently called in to collect Laura from my parents' house only to discover my Dad and Laura in the downstairs toilet. Laura had found herself a stool which she had placed directly under the sink. She was thus precariously positioned trying, in vain, to turn on the taps. Was my Dad commanding Laura to leave the taps alone? Was he perchance instructing her to get down from the stool and play elsewhere? No. He was tut tutting and his words to Laura were "For goodness sake, centralise the stool!" I ask you!

Finally, did anyone see a grey-haired Gene Pitney performing Robbie Williams' 'Angels' on national television a few weeks back? It was the most awful rendition of anything, I've ever seen. Look out for it on 'What on earth made them do that?' type programmes in the future. It should not be missed.

Anyway, must go.

God bless!

Judy

P.S. Thanks to Jeanine and Andrew for a lovely day on Saturday. Hope Dobbin is OK